Kalam and Yakub have a conversation in a place before heaven and hell

Vinod Narbar
Dr APJ Abdul Kalam is waiting at the lounge of the special airport where you can take a direct flight either to Heaven or Hell, depending on what you deserve.

Kalam is forced to wait as he is the sole passenger in that huge Airbus scheduled to fly to Heaven. The authorities want at least ten per cent of the seats to fill. The wait has been going on for over a decade.

On July 30, around 8 am, Yakub Memon walks in to the airport. He also has to wait as his flight to hell is over-booked.

The moment he sees Kalam, he runs to the former president. His eyes are burning with fury.

“Tell me one thing, Dr Kalam. Why is India so biased?”

“How can you say that? Look at what India has given me. Coming from such a humble background, I could not have imagined becoming a president. And see the affection now pouring in after my death,” says Kalam.

“I can see that. But this country killed me.”

“It’s because you planted bombs which killed 257 people.”

“But you made bigger bombs which can kill millions. Yet you are so revered,” Memon seems extremely irritated.

Kalam is shaken at this counter attack and for a moment he struggles to find an answer.

“See Yakub, I admit I made bombs. But that was to defend our country. You joined hands with an enemy country to kill your own men. Besides you violated the code of conduct. You are a chartered accountant. You had no business to get into making bombs.”

“Quiet,” comes a sudden booming voice from nowhere. It is the recycled ghost of Mullah Omar.

“Memon did not join the enemy. He was a loyal foot soldier of Allah in the fight against kafirs. He was hanged because he is a Muslim. By the way, I’m Mullah Omar, I die every two years.”

This does not amuse Memon at all. He looks around trying to figure out where the voice is coming from.

“I have had enough of you people and your nonsense. A stint in Pakistan made me realise how much better India is and that’s the reason why I returned. It was because of you people I had to pay with my life,” Memon starts sobbing.

Kalam places his arm around Memon and tries to console him.

“I know it was a bit harsh on you as you cooperated with the investigation. If I were the president, I would have accepted your mercy petition.”

“Then why did you not become president again?”

“You know Sonia Gandhi did not want me at the Rashtrapati Bhavan again. She was too impressed with the culinary skills of Pratibha Patil. I knew only how to make bombs,” Kalam says, not hiding his disappointment.

“This is a Christian conspiracy. She knew you would pardon a fellow Muslim. The Italian woman is waging a war against Islam and she regularly goes to the US to get funds for her mission. Let’s bomb America,” Mullah Omar shouts again.

This time the ever-smiling and non-violent Kalam throws his shoes at the direction the voice is coming from.

( Courtesy : Daily O )


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